Sunday, January 13, 2013

#ROW80 1ST QUARTER POST 4 – SUNDAY CHECK IN

O Hai!



Kind of looks like the inside of my head, except for the plastic guy. Okay, and except for all of the My Little Ponys. I think we should change "Sephiroth" to "Cthulhu" or "Zamorak," if "Cthulhu" isn't around. Did you ever notice how blasted hard it is to type "Cthulhu," and why in the Hell
can't we have a "Cthulhu" type quest in Runescape? Who do we have to pay off? Jagex? The Lovecraftian Archive?
  
So, what do I have to show for myself? I’m on cruise-control, so not much, this week. Another week older and a-deeper in debt, as the saying goes. I am in this weird kind of stasis, where one minute, I want to go like a bat out of hell, and then I am just fatigued beyond all reason the next minute. I can’t really concentrate very well when I’m in this state.

I had a bout of dementia when my sugar dropped the other night like I’ve never had before. And good ‘ol JC, being my wonderful man, talked me through it. When this happens, I know it’s coming and I just have to ride it like a rocket ship. Stuff starts seeming either too close, or this time everything was way far away and itty-bitty and had sped up. Sometimes, things slow down, and time drags. When this first happened, I had a psychotic break; it’s when I first manifested tremors that were noticeable, last March. But, hey! It’s all in my head; I’m just bipolar.

These “spells” last about 10 to 20 minutes and I remember them. They’re generally like Whee! Happy fun time! Except sometimes, I think I’m going to see God and I’m not so sure that I’m all ready to go, if you get my drift. But, everything starts making a kind of sense and I’m so damned hard-wired, that the cat, who is a chimera cat (ours is not QUITE as dramatic as Venus, but is similar)  and has the same colors and patterns as the rice cakes’ packaging and crackers’ packaging in my pantry, and the clock is always 4 minutes to midnight. I’m always watching “Numb3rs” on Hulu+ but sometimes, John Locke from “Lost” is on “Numb3rs” or Charlie Eppes from “Numb3rs” is on “Lost” and the dish towels are the same color as the uniforms of the football players on the TV that JC is watching and the jewels on “Bejeweled” always form a match 3 endlessly, until the sugar kicks in, and everything goes back to normal.  

Unless of course, there is ONE thing that is different. Then, I become immediately confused and don’t know what to do and all hell breaks loose. Not really, I just don’t know what to do and I can get panicked. That hasn’t happened in a while. The great thing is, I know if I eat something with sugar, I’ll be okay pretty quickly, but this is so exhausting. I’m not a diabetic, but this can’t be good for a body. My pulse races; my heart rate has gone as high as 120 and is high anyway. I’m lucky my cholesterol and blood pressure are low. I don’t want to start ranting about the medical community; what good is that going to do?

Governor Rick Scott - Beelzebub Party

"The Church Lady" from "SNL" would love this...

I do have one bit of lovely news. Florida Governor Rick Scott (R) is going to be the recipient of a gala jamboree-type rally being held by the Florida Association of Satanists, as they are named and in front of the Governor’s residence! No word on whether or not Twinkle-Toes is going to attend. I hope my invite is in the mail and I know; this is just too delicious for words! Maybe Governor Sparkle can sprout him some horns and hooves, eh? No, he already had them surgically removed; I’m confused. I just love the fact that there is a group of kooks out there who will embrace his charming personage. Maybe ol’ Scratch is collecting his debt early, hmm? 



Well, Microsoft bitches, it’s on. Blogger is still fucked up. Only it’s like a bad electrical problem in the wiring of my house, or maybe it's gremlins. It sure as hell isn't evil and it isn't mediocre on the best of days My work around is this: quit stalking me all over the fucking internet and I will quit telling everyone about what shitty software you write and foist on the world. You and I know that you write and push crap and that goes for all of your hardware “partnerships” and I oh wait, I lied. I don’t want your “15 minutes of  free tech support.” Don’t insult me. I shit better code than you ever did with a hangover when I was in school, writing QuickBasic. The logic hasn't changed, just your stupid bloated insecure crappy-ass bullshit. Your partners-in-crime, Oracle and Java with their beans got their asses in trouble. It's enough I use your shit. Quit bothering me on every goddamned website I visit. Go haunt someone who doesn't know their asses from their elbows and leave me the hell alone. Write a slimmed-down OS with no dancing baloney and shiny shit and I might actually write some apps.

I’m having too much fun with my new merry band of complainers. Some of us use IE (I don't even have IE on my system; that's some insecure shit right there,) some use FF, some use Chrome, we all use Blogger, which is probably a big mistake, right there. I started out all by myself, then I got like 45 new friends! I was so excited! Yay! And we were all bitching about the same thing… kind of. But, the point is, there are lots of random outbursts and asides. I notice the Blogger wizards are just as clueless as the people there to get help, so I seem to have found a new source of entertainment! Yay.

This week will probably see more cruise control, with a post about friendship and what it means. It turns out it means what we’re willing to invest in our lives. So, what does life mean to us? Rhetoric, I know. But I wrote lots of rhetoric in college and won awards for my writing. I never won awards for rhetorical living, though. Now, I’m trying to put all of the writing about into doing; it is not as easy as it sounds. 

6 comments:

alberta ross said...

That is one hell of a mind you have - how do you cope? function so well? amazing person you:) all the best for coming week

Eden "Kymele" Mabee said...

Um, well, we don't all use Blogger... I use Wordpress. I also don't use IE, FF, or Chrome (though Seamonkey is still part of the gecko platform).

As for being in stasis... sometimes it's what works. You do what you can, and you write. You've clearly written a blogpost. That counts. If it's not the writing you want to write, you write something you DO want to write. And you go from there. And ignore all the IE, Microsoft, Blogger, what-have-you... There's always a version of Linux out there to play with after all.

ViolaFury said...

Thank you for the kind words. I'm not sure what I've got going on here. I had and off-the-charts brilliant father and a really very intelligent mom who was so verbally adroit. As for functioning? It is to laugh, sometimes I don't. I just cope as I can. I can't go 90 miles an hour any more, so I have to absorb information at a slower pace than I would like to. That includes reading my ROW mates blogs. This coming week brings me a new friend and a new perspective. It will be interesting, I think. Thanks for the kind words and encouragement. You're a superb and awesome writer!

ViolaFury said...

Hello, Kymele! Thanks for stopping by. I am aware that we don't all use Blogger, just as we don't all use the same operating systems. It's not that I don't want to write, it's that sometimes I physically CAN'T. I would LOVE to go there. I had to STOP writing because I have worsening tremors and it makes me HATE the process, when I used to LOVE it. Also, my thinking gets fucked up beyond all belief. This is recent and I am not at all down with it, as we say here in the 'hood. I'm bipolar and that is recent as well.

The reason I mentioned all the applications and the operating systems is because I was a software engineer and had already done the trouble shooting. If you chose to misapprehend what I was saying I am sorry. What I was implying is that the problem is not Blogger, so much as it is bad and porous program writing from Microsoft and has been for years. My particular bitch is with them, with Oracle, with Dell and with anyone who pushes mediocre and substandard product off on to the unsuspecting masses with no thought for the future. Rather than having a tech-savvy public, we have user-friendly systems that are dangerous, porous and will bring us future problems. Thanks for stopping by.

Aaron Brinker said...

Mary,

I so love your rant on the governor! It sounds like old "Beelzebub" found his match! I guess that's why they are celebrating him with one huge "roasting!" (yes...it was a bad pun but it was my pun and one Hell of a good time)!

Alright...I know you were a software engineer before...so what do you know about web hosting? I am in need of some technical assistance and I am not sure where to turn (we can always take this up through e-mail after March of course)!!

I am so counting down the days for you my friend...I am 100% positive it is going to be a celebration type party time (and I don't mean the one like the governor is getting either)!!

Your friend,

Aaron

ViolaFury said...

Aaron,

I've really considered doing a whole post "The Many Faces of Governor Sparkle." Single-handedly, I've been a HUGE thorn in his side without leaving my chair. He has so much to answer for, not only for the shabby way he's treated the thousands upon thousands of homeless and poverty-stricken here in Florida, but for the flagrant disregard of the Constitution of the United States and President as well!

Yes, party-time in March! I wish I had buckets o' money. We'd have a tropical fiesta(!?) and I would have the Triple AAA's and fams flown in!

It is so very grand to hear from you; I've missed you sorely and am so glad you're back! I also want to get our SDBN (Silly Dad Blog Names) going again, and that might be perfect for our web hosting trials! Yay! Mary