This
whole thing has gotten completely fucked up. Not that I have planned out one
microsecond of any of it, but for 4 whole minutes yesterday, I had planned out
this epic post about Area 51, since it was ROW80 Day 51, get it? Yeah, I thought
it sucked too. Or, as my friend Gabe would say, "Would you like some lame sauce with that?" Then, Andi-Roo comes along with her “Suicide” post and I get all
emotional and have a case of lightning-in-a-bottle, which is how I do some of
my best writing. Well, let’s face it, it’s how I do my only writing pretty much.
If I try doing it the other way(s), whatever those are, it’s all—BUH, DUH, BUR
and not the least bit entertaining. Maybe this isn’t either, but it’s fun to
write.
So, I
proceed to rip off a bunch of rhetoric regarding my thoughts on suicide and how
it affected my life and then I decide to get clever. This is when I always run
into trouble. Yesterday was one of those days where I just couldn’t leave it
alone. I had spent the first part of the day torturing SETI and the astropulse.
You see, I didn’t like the color scheme. So, after painstakingly fiddling with
the algorithms and going through all the different colors (water world, desert hoo haa, tropic thunder, boo boo blah) and then tinkering
with custom and panels and all this HORSESHIT and updating the data and
upsetting the poor things, I ended up with the same batch of Rainbow Bright
stuff I had started with. I just went in a giant circle.
Then I
ran across Andi’s post. The call to arms! All systems go. Type, type, type and
madly. Proofread and slap that bitch in my blog. Now, we get “clever.” Hell,
here’s where stupid takes over in the driver’s seat. This happens a lot in my
life. I have certain routines I have to follow; if I don’t, I become hopelessly
muddled and, either screw everything up or nothing gets done. Whether or not
this is a function of my bipolarity or part of my physical condition, I can’t
say. I did not used to be like this. I used to be able to handle several things
and improvise in my routines. I can still do this musically, and my computer
skills haven’t suffered; maybe I just don’t give a shit. I suspect it’s because
I’m an old crock.
Anyway,
my routine after posting in my blog is to first post the link in FB. Then, I go
to Bit.ly and shorten the URL to post to Twitter with the hashmark #ROW80, so
that it’s picked up by the #ROW80 Daily paper of Mr. Wayne Borean. I have to
give this man credit. This is a nice online paper for bloggers and he puts this
out and updates it DAILY, along with about 70 billion other things he does. He is a dedicated, talented and kind man. The fact
that he and the rest of the ROW80 folks, Kait Nolan, et al. put up with me, are
more a testament to their great patience than my persistence. I’m a traveling
cat-fight of confusion.
Anyway, I
got “clever” and for my bit.ly #ROW80 post, I decided to “refer” to Andi-roo’s
original suicide post, alongside my “rebuttal,” and I did so in my usual
slap-dash manner, not bothering to check thing one. Then, I go off to play Club
Penguin, or more likely Runescape, since hardly anyone who talks plays Club
Penguin anymore. Imagine my horror, when, a few hours later, I see that the new
#ROW80 Daily by Mr. Wayne
Borean is out and there is a post of “SUICIDE – BECAUSE SOMETIMES LIFE ISANTICLIMACTIC” by VIOLAFURY! Well, $%#(%^@# I DID not write that story, I
wrote, “REBUTTAL TO SUICIDE – BECAUSE SOMETIMES LIFE IS not ANTICLIMACTIC.” So,
now MY name is plastered all over HER story. Being my Andi-Roo, she laughed it
off, but yikes! Anyone else would come and find me and beat me to death with a
spoon and I wouldn’t blame the person.
I do shit
like this all the time. This is worse than the time I was trying to respond to
a comment on my own blog and I have probably mentioned this. But I have one giant bitch; why
is every blogging platform the shits to work with? They all are impossibly
dense, non-intuitive, balky and just strange. I had a couple of blogs on
Wordpress. That sucked. I have my only blog on Blogspot and I can’t say I’m in
love with that. For God’s sake I supported Microsoft Office and Lotus Suite for
years and they weren’t this horrible. It’s like God took every failure in the
known universe and stuffed it into a box. They’re hideous. With the advancements
in software, operating systems and the java interfaces, shouldn’t this shit be
getting easier to manage, not harder? I understand the layers are denser and
the builds are more complex, but come on! I know, I know; spoken like a true
systems architect. Lemme shut up.
Anyway,
I was just trying to type one little paragraph to someone who was nice enough to
stop by, read my drivel and leave a comment. I go to post my response and
Blogspot spits out “you have to be logged in to perform that function.” Well, &*!#@()
So, I log in… and promptly follow myself. !#@$ Shit.
Well, I
have to go find Mr. Borean and tell him I did not write that fine article. I
have to tell him I did not stand at the crossroads with my pen and sell my soul
to the devil. I have to tell him that great post “SUICIDE – BECAUSE SOMETIMESLIFE IS ANTICLIMACTIC” was written by the wonderful, the @theworld4realz, andi-roo!
2 comments:
LOL...Mary, Mary, Mary....my philosophy seems to be a lot like Andi-Roos shit happens. Don't take it so personal. I do understand though 100% that it needs to be corrected. I would feel the same way and a correction would need to be posted but life happens and good, bad or indifferent sometimes things are out of our control and as long as we do the best to correct them it is the best we can ever ask.
Aaron :)
Aaron, thank you for the {{hugs}} It does matter. And it matters more to me when it's a friend and even more when it's a dear friend who has helped and encouraged me and welcomed me with open arms into her group of writerly friends. EGAD! I felt like Iago! Ouch. I am always about honesty; I did dishonesty. It sucked. Honesty keeps me whole, or a reasonable facsimile thereof and I treasure what I have with you all and I couldn't have this if I weren't honest. You are all so wonderful. Dear Andi-roo laughed, as I knew she would and today I Tweeted to Mr. Wayned this post and blah blah. Thanks again, Aaron. You are so special! Mary <3
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