Wednesday, January 6, 2021




After all of the denial. After all of the normalization. After all of the rationalization and nay-saying and trying to work around the person at the center of the discussion, much like trying to avoid the elephant in the room, our country has finally had to come to the grim realization that Donald J. Trump is merely a thug, and like any thug, he tried to apply muscle to both Houses today to force, stall, or subvert the inevitable.

I have to admit that I've kept him on the outside of my bubble for a long period of time. My bubble is this: my Asperger condition. I'm highly functioning, but like any Aspy, too much stimulation or stress gets all of my other “inconveniences”, like essential tremor going and so, I retreat to non-knowing bliss. Pretty much the last time I dealt with anything Trumpian was the day I returned from Japan and he was doing some of his immigration shit and wouldn't you know it, but, I had to fly into Dulles Airport and... it sucked. It took forever to get through Customs, even being legally blind. Whatamess. I decided that I would check out for a few years and that would be okay.

Trump. And dogs playing poker. I think the dogs won.

So, I went off to play viola, rescue some cats, move to South Carolina and get engaged, rescue some more cats, play some more viola, and then along came 2020. Holy Mackerel.

To say that this year was bad is like saying that Florida has hurricanes, or California experiences wildfires. I cannot believe in the sheer magnitude of the loss of life and the sickness and the blow to the economy that would NEVER have happened had we not stayed locked down for an initial six to eight weeks and flat-lined, instead of a three week lock down and open back up, when diseases don't work like that, especially a NOVEL virus that has never been seen before and is zoonotic (translation: jumps from species to species; a special kind of hell) to boot! I still haven't left the house since last February.

Also, a little reality check here. Does anyone remember in about the 3rd week of the announcement of having COVID-19 on U.S. soil, that the U.S. Navy said on Twitter one bright March day, “Oh btw, Aliens are a thing!” Well, they did and I totally haven't forgotten, but I digress.

Anyway, as we went through this worst of all years, and experienced George Floyd's murder over and over via video in late May (which was in itself 8 years long) and finally saw people get well and truly fed-up with all of the rampant killing being done by police and #BLM led the charge to protest and make whites 'fess up to the fact that we've never, EVER truly addressed racism, nor made everyone free, safe and equal, we got to take that time to look at ourselves and address our own shortcomings and say “Yeah, it DOES suck to be a black person in this here United States. Now, what are we going to do to fix this?” These kinds of moments are our opportunities to leap forward and to make reparations and acknowledge that we can do better.

History gives us this ability to seize that moment and it came again today, January 6, 2021, when Donald Trump's thugs stormed the Capitol and took over the House and Senate. It was astonishing. It was frightening. It was sad and horrific. This is the United States at its worst, because unlike the War of 1812, we did it to ourselves.

When we voted in November, 2020, we voted in Joe Biden for our 46th President of the United States. Since that was made official, Donald Trump has sent Rudy Giuliani, his attorney to several Supreme Courts, who turned down his petitions in every case, but one. Donald Trump has tried to get the Electoral College of each state thrown out so that he can substitute his own delegates; that too has been denied. He did manage to get some GOP Senators and Congressmen to question the validity of what was to have been today's final validation by the sitting Vice President, Mike Pence, but just in case that wasn't going to work, he called on his Proud Boys and other white Nationalists and Trumpists to intervene. They did so by storming the Capitol building and smashing things.

This is called "fomenting rebellion". Trump should be impeached immediately under Amendment 25 and arrested for that and his followers should be arrested for committing "insurrection". This is still a country of laws and truth. What he doesn't understand is that if a Revolution DOES come, it may not have the desired outcome and there is always, ALWAYS a Trotsky waiting in the wings.

This is thuggery at its finest and you don't get any more brutish than this. This is shit that was done in the 1st Republic of Rome and that was a long time ago. When the men and women of the Senate and House were finally allowed to re-convene this evening, Mitch McConnell (THAT fucking weasel) looked shaken, and spoke of the need to have a country that was “Ruled by Law” or some nonsense. Other senators spoke and were impassioned that the American people had spoken; that a clear majority had voted for Joe Biden and that by putting aside their wishes, we would no longer stand as a republic, or a Leader among countries. As it stands, we've already blackened our own eye, and we have a long way to go to repair our image. Let's not go down the road of the “banana republic”.

Wednesday, September 2, 2020

Wednesday, July 1, 2020


I haven't checked in, or written a great deal, lately. Time and events have been rather overwhelming and when I do write, I find I write out of a sense of urgency, or because I'm so enraged by what I've witnessed, I cannot hold it in. My orchestra is on hiatus, for how long? Who knows? I live in a Red State, which has completely and very ham-fistedly bungled any head start the Medical Community possibly had on containing the Coronavirus and they re-opened much, much, too soon, as we are now seeing. The global window is rapidly closing, and there is a new swine flu virus in Asia, that is, supposedly, not transmissible to humans, although people who do work with swine there, have tested positive for it, but are asymptomatic, and there are no signs that the virus is transmissible from person to person*.

Shortly after I wrote my previous post regarding the evictions en masse in the lower-income housing not very far from my house, and the heart-breaking image of the children's toys came the death of George Floyd and the Revolution took to the streets. I really had nothing to say on that, other than, “about time” and “I can be your Trotsky, should you need one”, but felt the people were eloquent enough in their righteous anger and fury over the dis-enfranchisement and the breaking of the contract that America should have kept with Black Americans and POC. Besides, I mentioned “fault lines” in my last post prior to all of the civil disobedience and Here. We. Are. We all do want the same thing and deserve it: equal treatment under the Law, Safety, and Fairness. What could be easier?

Elijah McClain

But, apparently, we still have nameless gorms who prefer living in the bad old days of Jim Crow and “Whites Only”, or more recently "White Power". Again, I'm really glad my folks aren't here to see this travesty of a country we've become. I remember my father and his sister telling me of the time they were driving in the old flivver, with their father, Grandpa Wallace, in like 1937, in the back woods of Michigan, and they happened upon three white men, trying to string up a black man, who was on a lonely road, in the wrong place, at the wrong time. My grandfather, being a Wallace, stopped the car and like something out of “To Kill A Mockingbird”, confronted the men. He stood them down. Being the cowards that they were, they left the scene, leaving the black man alone.

My father was pretty young at the time and I got most of the story from his older sister, Mary, my namesake. It seems the black man was walking the back roads of the lower peninsula of Michigan, looking for work. His people were in Illinois. My Grandfather came from a long line of crofters in Scotland. Sir William was originally a farmer before he led armies. He was also literate, having been schooled by his uncle, the local Priest. Anyway, his great-great-great-great, many times over grandson took the man home and fed him, and gave him a place to sleep for a few weeks, while he helped my Grandmother with chores and my Grandfather in the fields. Winter was coming, so when the hard frost hit, my folks paid the man, and sent him home. My folks being of Scots blood didn't hold with all of this “colored this” and “colored that”; they had also known oppression in their day. , However, I really, really digress.

This is about the life and death of Elijah McClain; a young man I barely heard of until this week. There were a few things in the news about him. But, there's been so much lately. We started the year with an Impeachment Trial, Kobe Bryant died, which was huge and then, went right into Covid-19, with a side-helping of Aliens, courtesy of the U. S. Navy, in the early days of the Pandemic; I guess on the off-chance we'd all have whip-lash and have forgotten how to read. We closed the Economy, and then, when cases slowed, we opened the Economy, and... OOOPS! Too soon! Now, we're dealing with exponential increases in cases of Covid-19 and our global window is closing. We may as well just throw in the towel. Period.

But, back to Elijah McClain. A gentle-souled, sweet young man who lived in Aurora, Colorado. By all accounts, he was a wonderful person. He worked as a massage therapist and his clients loved him for his sweetness, warmth and the way he lit up a room. He played the violin and on his breaks, he would go to the local animal shelter and play for the homeless cats and dogs there. “It soothed them,” one young lady said. I wish I knew more about Elijah. I wish I knew him when he was alive.

One night last year, on August 24, 2019, Elijah went to get his brother an iced tea. He wore an open ski mask because he suffered from anemia and he would get cold. I know what that's like. Someone called the police and reported a “suspicious person, wearing a mask and waving his hands”. Although unarmed and just listening to music, police say a “struggle ensued”. A carotid hold was placed on Elijah and when he didn't calm down, he was injected with Ketamine**, a supposed “therapeutic dose” to calm him down. It put him into cardiac arrest. He was transported to the hospital and put on life support. His family finally had him taken off life support on August 30, brain-dead and covered in bruises.


Elijah, playing his violin to the stray cats in the shelter. It soothed them the shelter workers said. My cats love it when I play.

This is the bare-bones, brief story. For months, the body-cam footage was not released by the APD. When released, an officer can be heard admitting that Elijah had done nothing illegal prior to his arrest. Another officer accuses Elijah of trying to grab one of their guns. In the meantime, Elijah can be heard trying to say he's turning off his music; he vomits, and says his house is “right there”, then apologizes. “I wasn't trying to do that. I just can't breathe correctly.” One of the officers can be heard threatening to sic his dog on Elijah and also that he showed an “extreme show of strength when officers tried to pin back his arms”.

Very little of the officers' protocol can be observed however, due to their contention that their body cams all fell off during the arrest. The autopsy was inconclusive, and subsequent news reports seemed to point to McClaine himself as the unwitting cause of his own demise, because he struggled so, but, as Mari Newman, an attorney for the McClain family stated at the time, “Whatever the report says, it's clear if the police had not attacked Elijah McClain, he would be alive today.”

The officers, as officers in just about every one of these cases, with the notable exceptions of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and most recently Rayshard Brooks, got off, initially, but a ground-swell of outrage and a plea from the Aurora, CO community and then, the nation, led the Attorney General of CO to re-open the Elijah McClain case and take a good, hard look at the injustice that was done to this fine, young man.

As a musician, I feel this. As a human being, this is just beyond the pale. Last Thursday evening, there was a violin vigil held for Elijah McClain in Aurora, in a park. Many string players showed up to play and practicing social distancing, they were playing Pachelbel's “Canon in D”. I know this piece by heart. I can riff on it, play it blues-y, play it jazz-y, play it in my sleep, play it upside down. But, I didn't get to hear much of what these talented, young musicians were doing, because the cops showed up. They showed up and they did what they do best. They threw a bunch of pepper spray or tear gas and they were in full riot gear. I could not hear any music over the screaming of “NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!” My poor kitty Allie could hear this and she got distressed. What is so wrong with us as a country that we can no longer assemble as is OUR RIGHT UNDER THE LAW! Not just any right, but our 1st AMENDMENT RIGHT!

These people weren't preaching sedition, or treason (why bother, we have a treasonous bastard for a President?), nor were they plotting the overthrow of the government, although it may be time to start thinking about a major change, because this shit ain't working!

 courtesy of:@ohsnapitztab via the CUT            

MUSIC transcends color, sex, orientation, religion, culture, time and belongs to everyone. I will NEVER get to hear Elijah McClain play, but boy, do I wish I did. I think I really missed out on something lovely. The more we take the beauty and grace out of our society the uglier we become. I, for one, don't want to see this happen. Say his name. Elijah McClain. Remember him. Say his name. Someone must; I know he's indelibly etched upon my heart.


*CNN Report, June 29, 2020
**Ketamine was approved for use on humans in 1962. Prior to that it was used primarily as a horse tranquilizer. It is known as Vitamin K, Special K on the street and is known to cause seizures, dementia and can cause arrhythmia when used in people with heart conditions.